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Last month we began diving into what it means to have a life-giving home- a home that has a foundation rooted in God’s love and truth. A life-giving home is full of people who love and honor God! In case you missed it, click here for last month’s post!

This past summer, I made lunch for my four oldest kids and laid out their plates on the counter for each of them to take outside. In the summer, they love to eat outside on the deck. My oldest daughter was holding the baby while I was doing this, so my son grabbed his plate and hers and ran to tell her that lunch was ready. 

You can probably guess how this ends.

He dropped a plate of yogurt, grapes, blueberries, and sandwiches and I watched as they splattered all over the living room floor. Would you like to know how I reacted? I was not kind. And my son then reacted negatively to me and I could see clearly at that moment how my fussiness in response to an accident, to a little boy who was only trying to be kind to his sister, ruined the teamwork and the unity that was just present in my home.

In that moment, I was being a fussy mom.
Maybe you can relate.

When I think about what a life-giving home is not, I think of a fussy mom. A fussy mom is not easy to please. She keeps a record of wrongs and she is constantly inconvenienced. When her husband comes home, she is flustered and can’t wait to tell him all about all the hard things she went through that day. A fussy mom overreacts over spilled juice and is often found barking orders and complaining about the state of her house. 


Destroying or Building Up?

“The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish tears it down with her own hands.”
Proverbs 14:1

A fussy mom most definitely doesn’t sound like she is building her house up. In fact, her fussy attitude will destroy her home. She creates a culture of complaining and discontentment, which is actually life-taking.

However, in a life-giving home, a mom is easy to please. She is quick to forgive and willing to stop what she’s doing to meet a need. She cheerfully greets her husband and he looks forward to coming home to her. This mom is steady and doesn’t allow her attitude to be changed by her circumstances.

Let’s go back to my fussiness at my son dropping his plate of food. What if I had, instead of getting upset, chosen to laugh it off? What if I had chosen to cheerfully tell him that maybe he shouldn’t have run through the house with full plates, or suggest that, in the future, he take just one plate at a time?

Regardless of how I responded, I still had a mess to clean up. My reaction didn’t change that part. And I think that’s the key. Having a fussy attitude doesn’t fix the problem. The problem, the mess, the disobedient child, the basket of unfolded laundry – those things aren’t changed when we complain about them. We fuss about them, tearing our houses down, and then are left with a bigger mess than when we started. Now I have to clean up the yogurt splattered all over my living room and work to be back in fellowship with my son. 

So when we are tempted to be fussy moms, let’s remember the calling God has given us to build our homes up by being cheerful- even in less-than-ideal circumstances. This is a visible way of demonstrating God’s love for us as we choose to love our family by being cheerful and easy to please, instead of fussy.